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“Always remember that putting yourself first is the most important step in finding love.” It’s clear with the release of her book, Love Him or Leave Him: But Don’t Get Stuck With the Tab, that Loni Love, a comedian (including stand-up), an actress and talk show host, lives by her own advice. “There’s only one thing I love as much as making people laugh, and it’s giving advice. Ask anyone who’s received one of my love lessons and they’ll tell you I have a special gift.” It comes as no surprise that she’s written a book abundant with advice for women seeking or looking to maintain love. 

In the introduction of the book, she explains how the environment in which she was raised provided her with early life lessons on the importance of putting yourself first.

I grew up in the Brewster-Douglass Housing Projects in Detroit during the height of the crack epidemic. The streets were filled with drug dealers and prostitutes. Coming up in such a rough environment, a girl had to be tough and street-smart to survive. I saw firsthand what happens to women who are foolish in love, or just plain foolish.” Love also credits her mother for instilling the lesson. I learned this lesson, up close and personal, watching my single mother manage her dating life. After her divorce, my mother, Momma Love,had plenty of boyfriends, but she refused to take crap from anyone. I remember one time, one of her boyfriends, Mr. Herbert, was living with us, and Momma Love found out he’d cheated on her with Miss Bernice, the Bible study teacher. The next day his clothes and his Bible were out in the trash. Her philosophy was: no woman has to put up with second-rate treatment; someone better will always come along.’Never be a side dish. Always be the main course.’ It’s a lesson I took to heart.”

Loni Love’s Important Advice to Women  was originally published on

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