“I loved him, you know,” she said. “But I wasn’t like ‘oh, gosh, yes my baby, ooh,’ you know. It wasn’t that. It was more like what do I do now, you know?”
“I guess in a sense I did feel unattached because you know, I really, really wanted to connect with him because I wanted to breast-feed. And when he didn’t latch on and when I couldn’t produce milk I just felt like, ‘Is this the wrong child?’ You know what I mean? ‘Am I the wrong mother?’”
“You’re in shock,” she said. “And you know, it took me a few days to really, like, come to terms with the fact that I am a mom and this is my baby.”
“Well you know, I was questioning my motherhood. … Like, is this a mistake that God made? Or like, is this something that I need to hand over to my husband because he and the baby connected instantly. And I wanted that. And I guess I was a little jealous, pretty much. Am I being really honest here? I guess I am,” she said.
