Going out solo isn’t for suckers. Here are some very logical reasons why you should try it.
5. Your Homegirl Can’t Dress
Call it shallow if you want, but you know she’s coming out the house in patent leather heels, a t-shirt, and jeans, looking like 2004. You really wanna be photographed with her….? Yea…so don’t even tell her you’re going out, and apologize for not inviting her later.
4. Your Ugly Friend Gone be Hating All Night
Here you are, getting chose and whatnot….and she’s not, so she just won’t let you be great! So just because she decided to tag along without combing her hair, you’re supposed to babysit her all night and swat away your future ex-boyfriend? And this is why you leave her at home. Live your best life, sis.
3. Your Homeboy Likes to Fight
Why do people fight in the club?? Anyway, he’s been on one since you picked him up, and soon as y’all get in the parking lot, he says “first person look at me crazy, I’m knocking out.” You proceeded to look at him crazy, and he didn’t touch you. So now he’s super mad..get him a cape. Do you really wanna get put out the club before you find a young lady to fondle later….? Leave him at home.
2. You Know Your Friend Don’t Have no Money
This is your fault. She hesitated to tell you she wanted to come out with you, because she and you both knew she was broke. But being the friend you are…you tell her to tag along. And here you are with a $212 bar tab, and you only had 2 drinks! Save your money, go out alone, and make a medium ugly man buy your drinks.
1. You’re the Only Single One in the Crew
This is me. Do you know how annoying it is to be the only single one in the crew? Everybody’s boyfriends and husbands are looking at you funny like you’re tryna corrupt their bae, because apparently men don’t have self-esteem…and you just tryna kick it with your girls. Listen, go out by yourself. You can sleep well at night knowing nobody is checking up on you, telling you they miss you, or waiting for you to get back so they can put you to sleep. Wait…I think I need a man…