Happy Good Friday! Everyday above ground is a good day, but Fridays are for positive vibes, happy thoughts, and good news only. So avoid these things to keep the Good Friday going:
5. You Get Married – Don’t get me wrong, marriage is a beautiful thing. Look at Cassie! But can’t it wait until Monday? You have a lifetime ahead of you to hide your cheating; at least postpone the wedding to next week and use this weekend to do it with no shame.
4. You Don’t Pay Your Internet Bill – You know you got that text saying they were gonna cut it off, but you just knew in your heart you could get a payment arrangement. And everybody is supposed to come over and binge watch A Black Lady Sketch Show, because you’re the only one paying for HBO. Pay the bill before you get embarrassed and your smart tv calls you a dummy and says it can’t connect to a network.
3. You Get Denied Vacation Days – Ain’t nobody tell you to wait until the day before vacation, to put in the request for vacation! Now everybody else put their days in before you, and you can’t take off because they’re short-staffed. You see what procrastination gets you? A bad attitude and no morning sex. Now go fill out that paperwork before the money you spent on condoms goes to waste.
2. You Almost have a Heat Stroke – You already only drink pop because you think water is boring. But to add insult to injury, you think it’s fall because it’s about to be October, so you’re ready to break out the jean jacket as you walk a half a mile to the store. Sir, it’s 100 degrees. And now you’re in the hospital because you said beauty is pain. Put on a white T now, before you almost die later.
1. You’re Late to the Barbecue – Your auntie told you that it was just family coming over and you didn’t need to dress up. But nooo…..you just had to contour and highlight, because your auntie’s neighbor just got divorced and you tryna see what’s up. But by the time you got there, all the food was gone and the people left with it. Welp, guess you gone make a brisket sandwich and watch reruns of Dr. Phil with your auntie Belinda.
