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I need you to keep your job long enough to find one where you’re not gonna beat up anyone. So avoid these people at work, at all costs.

5. Messy Mary – She knows your business better than you do, she knows all about your boss cheating on his wife with the secretary, and she heard about that itch that won’t go away. You really wanna tell her ANYTHING about your life?

4. Cheerful Charles – He’s the most chipper person in the building. That’s great, but because he never shuts up, you can’t get any work done. You really tryna be at work until 7 when you get off at 5?

3. Petty Patrice – She needs some sex. Every time you see her, she has a snide remark about your outfit, your hair, or your life. And if you’re wondering who keeps stealing your snacks out the break room that you put your name on…it was her.

2. Know-it-All Nancy – You don’t even have to ask a question,m and here comes Nancy with an answer. She don’t even work in your department! Girl, have a seat in every chair in the office and watch a YouTube tutorial on how to make friends.

1. Emotional Emily – This poor baby got cheated on twice, lost her edges, and can’t wear anything higher than a kitten heel. And she really needs your ear. Naw, she needs a therapist. So unless you work at a support group….find her a new friend.