People say the darndest things, and they make no sense, like the beginning of this sentence. So let’s explore more idiotic phrases, shall we?
5. “I’m so hungry my stomach is touching my back!”
Did you ever take biology?? Why isn’t your stomach touching your pelvis or your intestines, or something it could possibly reach??
4. “You’re talking behind my back”
The ‘front’ of your back would be your back, so ‘behind’ your back must be your front…and they would technically be saying it to your face. So…what’s the problem?”
3. You not fat, you healthy!”
I was a chubby kid so I heard this a lot. Find me one doctor who said, “your cholesterol is high, your blood pressure is through the roof, and you’re morbidly obese. Man, you’re so healthy!” Tell these fat kids the truth!
2. “When it rains, it pours”
What is it pouring out of? Does the rain come out of a big measuring cup and when it rains hard it’s because God tipped the cup over too much?
1. “Jesus take the wheel”
Listen, no matter your religion, historically speaking, wasn’t no cars during the time of Jesus! This is Dallas; savior or not, I don’t trust nobody who’s never driven a car, on 635.